Abandonment

I haven’t posted in a long time and it bothers me. I feel like I have abandoned this project. There have been too many things going on relating to job opportunities that forced me to stay quiet in fear of letting the cat out the bag.

Last week I started a new job as the CEO of a new brokerage business but my sense of abandonment extends further to my family as I now spend Monday to Thursday in Melbourne with the family in Sydney.

I have lots of new material I intend to share in the near future

Insurance and Getting Cute

When I was 20 yrs old my father introduced me to a guy from the USA and said listen to what this guy has to say and make up your own mind. The guy was a life insurance broker and I guess this was my first experience with buying life insurance. The most unpleasant part of my decision to go for it, was the prostrate exam that the policy forced me to have.

Anyway lets fast forward 23 yrs I can get far cheaper life cover in Australia where I live than the policy in the US is costing me so I decided with the weak Aussie Dollar this would be a good time to cash in the surrender value of the policy. As you can see from the chart below the value in AUD has gone up more than 25% in value in the last year or so.

Here comes the cute part, my wife fancies herself as a currency trader. She tells me that she has heard comments that AUDUSD is heading towards 69 cents so we should not cash the cheque yet. Her trade is already 2 cents in the money but this is where I say be careful not to get too cute. I personally feel very neutral on things at the moment and would happily exchange my USD for AUD now. We are at quite an important technical point should we break the support around the 76 cent level. Should we not break to new lows then I think we can see a decent size multi month bounce from these levels.

I look forward to reporting back the insights I gain from my wife’s new found zest for trading forex.

AUDUSD

 

 

Ego Attachment to what we Read

I just picked up a book for my 15yr old daughter from the library. I needed some help from the librarian and then as I was leaving I said to her, “I have to tell you the book isn’t for me but my daughter”. Why did I say that, why was I worried that she would judge me for reading this genre of book?

The book was a fantasy book called Allegiant by Veronica Roth, hardly something to be embarrassed about? On some further reflection I always bring a book from my considerable library to the synagogue to help pass “slow” phases (what can I do, I love to read), and I always place the cover of my books face down so that others passing by don’t get to see the title of what I am reading.

My choice of books is certainly not in the mainstream and is of a very esoteric nature in many instances, which I guess makes me a little self-conscious. I don’t necessarily want to be associated as that loopy mystical guy, yet in many instances it is something I strive for.

Coming back to why I needed to say to the librarian that book is for my daughter; I think the books we read are a window into our soul, and strangely I was worried about what a women who I have never seen before might think about me. At this stage I have no fitting answers, to why I care.

I do however feel that what we read is a very important insight into who we are as a person. I only hope that I have a different view of judging a person by the TV they watch. While writing the above in a “free association” mindset I realize I think I have answered my own question within a Jungian persona point of view.

Like the persona we share with the world in terms of our personality such as extroversion or introversion, we are doing the same with the books we read and the TV we watch. If for instance most of the books I read are academic in nature then I am probably projecting an intellectual persona to the world. Therefore when I checked Allegiant out I suddenly felt a tension between the persona I project and this caused me enough discomfort/embarrassment/insecurity to try and justify it as in an ego defence.

As a student of the psyche this insight and my willingness to go deeper into the complex allows me to bring to consciousness something I didn’t realize was affecting me unconsciously. These insights are incredibly powerful as they help us bring to consciousness why we are feeling like we are feeling.

Today I am feeling anxious because I requested something very important from someone. I didn’t quite realize how deeply this important request was affecting me, through this seemingly innocuous statement to a librarian I have now placed my emotions in context. The need to protect my ego helped me see how much of my ego is attached to the request I made and how vulnerable I feel. What to do with this knowledge? I am not sure exactly but just realizing that I am anxious and why is actually powerful knowledge and is already causing me to relax 🙂